What do best men do?

If your first thought after hearing the phrase “Of course I’d love to be your maid of honor” was “What does a maid of honor actually do?”, then this blog post is for you.

Witnesses: Civil Registry Office and Church

Your responsibilities depend mainly on whether you’re serving as a witness at a religious or civil wedding ceremony. For a civil ceremony, the only thing you really have to do is sign your name. To do this, you must be at least 18 years old, be able to provide identification, and understand the language in which the ceremony is conducted. But even that isn’t set in stone. If, for example, you’re not of legal age, you can still serve as a symbolic witness. In that case, you won’t sign anything, but you can still support the bride and groom.

In a Catholic church wedding, this option isn't available. You must be at least 18 years old and sign the marriage certificate to confirm the marriage. However, your religious affiliation doesn't matter in this case.

Witnesses support the bride and groom

Being chosen as a best man or maid of honor is not only a wonderful sign of trust from the bride and groom, but also, in a way, a great honor. However, “great responsibility” comes not only from “great power,” but also from “great honor.” From now on, you’ll play an important supporting role on the wedding team. Your job is to help the bride and groom with planning, organizing, and communication. It’s best to discuss exactly how you’ll do this with them. Here’s an impossibly long list of tasks you can talk to them about:

The Best Man's and Maids of Honor's Responsibilities During Wedding Planning

• Researching and Selecting Wedding Vendors
• Planning a Bachelorette or Bachelor Party
• Assistance with selecting and purchasing a wedding dress or wedding suit
• Planning the Wedding Schedule
• Planning Wedding Games
• Creating and Organizing a Gift List
• Booking Guest Accommodations
• Arranging Gifts for Guests
• Support with all DIY aspects of the wedding
• Arranging the Church Decorations (Church Wedding)
• Planning and, if necessary, designing the church program (church wedding)
• Composing Prayers of Intercession (Church Wedding)

Duties of the best man and maid of honor on the evening or morning before the wedding

• Arranging a place to stay (for couples who live together)
• Planning for the Evening Before
• Getting Breakfast
• Help with Getting Ready
• Arranging the Wedding Car
• If necessary, act as a chauffeur

Duties of the Best Man and Maids of Honor During the Wedding Ceremony

• Storing the Bridal Bouquet
• Signature
• Ring Presentation
• Payment of Registrars
• Reciting the Intercessions (Church Wedding)
• Payment for Church Musicians (Church Wedding)
• Storage of gifts given when offering congratulations

Duties of the Best Man and Maids of Honor During the Celebration

• Play Usher
• Keep the bride and groom hydrated (important!)
• Coordinate the program schedule
• Serve as the point of contact for catering staff, musicians, other service providers, and guests
• Giving a Wedding Speech
• Host games
• Open the dance floor

Duties of the Best Man and Maids of Honor After the Reception

• Arrange transportation for the bride and groom and, if applicable, their guests
• Storing Leftovers
• Help with cleanup at the venue
• Collect all of the guests' cell phone photos and videos
• Transportation for the bride and groom to the airport for their honeymoon

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But first: chill!

Yes, the to-do list is long. But these are just ideas you can discuss with the bride and groom. Basically, you don’t have to—and shouldn’t—do anything that you or the bride and groom don’t like. Just grab the other maid of honor or best man, sit down with the bride and groom, bring a bottle of wine, and then figure out which tasks you should actually take on. If you end up doing one or two extra things on top of that, you’ll be the best maids of honor and best men who’ve ever read this all the way through.