How do I write a wedding speech?

You get to give a speech at the wedding? Congratulations! Being asked to give a wedding speech is, first and foremost, a great honor—one that not everyone is granted. But you’re not feeling so optimistic? You’ve known about it for months, but you haven’t even started planning because you simply have no idea where to begin? You’d love to ask if it’s okay not to do it, but you don’t want to disappoint anyone? If you keep thinking, “There’s still time—I’ll just write the speech later,” you’ll probably end up drowning in total writing chaos until 3 a.m. on the night before the wedding. So you’d better start NOW!

You probably already know what you want to say, but you can't seem to find the right words, or you have no idea how to turn that into an entertaining speech? Don't panic—that's probably how everyone feels at first. We'll give you a few tips for writing a great wedding speech.

‍

Take your time

Take your time and start writing your speech early. Often, a few ideas come to mind later on, so you'll have plenty of time to make adjustments and changes until the speech is finally perfect.

‍

Incorporate something personal

While ready-made ideas from the internet can provide good inspiration and a few pointers, they should never be copied exactly. Especially for an event as emotional as a wedding, a personal touch is absolutely essential. Nothing makes people laugh or moves them to tears more than a personal anecdote or two. So be sure to include a inside joke or a memory that connects the two of you. It doesn’t necessarily have to be understood by all guests if the topic is only mentioned briefly or in passing. But be careful: dark humor probably won’t be understood by everyone and should therefore be avoided if possible.

‍

Be yourself and don't be afraid

Don't try to force yourself to do something that makes you feel uncomfortable. No one wants to see you nervously stuttering as you try to do something that doesn't come naturally to you. It won't help to drink to work up the courage, either. If public speaking isn't your thing, the others probably know that anyway. In that case, they'll definitely appreciate it if you say anything at all. Just keep it short—close your eyes and get it over with. By the way, cheat sheets aren’t a no-go for a speech—especially if you’re not a good speaker. Plus, holding something in your hands gives you a little confidence. If you’re totally nervous about the speech, maybe you can team up with someone else who has to give a speech, and the two of you can just do it together.

Practice makes perfect

Very important: Don't just read the speech quietly ten times. Feel free to stand in front of the mirror and say the words out loud—it really helps you internalize the speech.

‍

The Structure of the Ideal Wedding Speech:

1. Greet the guests.
2. Introduce yourself and explain your relationship to the bride and groom.
3. Start your speech with an appropriate quote, a joke, or an anecdote.
4. Tell us what makes the bride and groom and their relationship so special from your perspective. Why do you think the bride is good for the groom—and vice versa? It’s okay if a tear or two rolls down your cheek here.
5. Congratulate the bride and groom and raise your glass to toast the newlyweds together with the guests.

Whether you're Dad, Mom, the maid of honor, or Grandma—one thing always applies: The speech should be short and to the point, and entertaining for all the guests.